Before Lincoln turned our party of two into a family of three, I thought I knew what I was getting myself into. I’d been told about the 3am feedings and not showering until 2pm (or let’s be real – not at all) but no matter how many parents I talked to, nor how many books I read, I found out there were at least 10 things I never knew about having a newborn until I experienced them myself, which I will happily share with you! And don’t be scared. Wait ’til you get to number one. (Also those are Lincoln’s feet. I could just eat them up, I could.)
10. Get ready to do some laundry
Buy stock in P&G now because you will be doing a ton of laundry in the first couple of weeks. I repeat, a TON of laundry! From mattress pads and fitted crib sheets, to blankets, onsies, and changing table covers, I had no idea one little person could produce so much laundry. That being said, now that we’ve learned to ahem, aim it DOWN, our laundry has gone down significantly, but between the three of us I still do at least one load a day. (I use Dreft detergent and Purex no-dye, fragrance-free  softener.)
9. You will sweat at night. So much.
I thought the AC was busted the first night I woke up completely soaked in sweat after getting home from the hospital. Then I tore the covers off and realized the bedroom was cool and crisp as a cucumber. The same thing happened the next night…and the next night…until my friend finally asked me – have you had the night sweats yet? Um, YES! Why didn’t anyone tell me about night sweats?! So bizarre. Just plan on adding your PJs into your daily load of laundry.
8. Hormones are a bitch
There I said it. Of course I read all about Postpartum Depression and the baby blues before Lincoln came, but I was not at all prepared for how unbelievably crazy the sudden drop in hormones made me feel after he was born. I cried (read: lost it) when Ben nearly had to go out of town for 3 days when Lincoln was a week and half old. I cried while watching a news segment about premature babies. I cried when Ben suggested we upgrade our Costco membership (not kidding.) While I don’t think I had PPD or the baby blues, there is absolutely no denying that my emotions were out of control for at least a week post-birth. Thankfully I started feeling like my normal self after two (long) weeks!
7. Forgetfulness (especially at night!)
Blame the wacky sleep schedule, but nobody told me how forgetful I’d become post-baby! A few weekends ago Ben and I were driving out to a nearby lake to take a walk with Lincoln, and I forgot the stroller. Ben feeds Lincoln in the early morning, yet just last night I found myself feeding him when he walked in with the bottle. What?! Just make lists and forgive yourself when you feel like you should be committed.
6. Experiencing uncertainty
I have always been a quick decision maker. I hate dawdling and just want to make a choice and move on. Now that Lincoln is here I have become the most uncertain person about everything! I am so scared that I’ll make a decision that will negatively affect him. Hopefully this is a phase, but I kind of doubt it…
5. Learn to love cold food
A hot meal? What’s that? I’m only kind of kidding, but be prepared for your meals to be interrupted by diaper changes, nap rescues, nighttime fussiness…and laundry. It could take you awhile to get back to that yummy hot meal you planned on eating hours ago.
4. Girlfriends are gold
I never knew I’d rely so much on my girlfriends who are also moms for advice during the first uncertain couple of weeks after having a baby. Make sure you get those girls on speed dial!
3. Battling back pain
Do yourself a favor and schedule a massage for 2 or 3 weeks post-baby BEFORE you give birth. Between nursing and pumping (which kills your back,) hunching over the diaper changing table, and constantly stooping to coo at your sweet baby, your back will be taking a beating. Ben’s been great at giving me rubs, but I can’t wait to get a legit massage!
2. Online shopping is a gift
During those first weeks when it’s not always easy to get out of the house, online shopping will become your best friend. From swaddle blankets and a hands-free pumping bra, I have ordered a ton of stuff online lately and seriously, with shipping these days, I feel like my items have all arrived 2 days later no matter which shipping option I picked. Go Amazon.
1. It is ALL worth it!
It’s cliche, but so true. I’d eat cold hot dogs, walk as a hunch back, and do 100 loads of laundry a day just to have Lincoln in our lives. 1-9 is nothing compared to the unconditional love I feel every second I look into his face, and the joy his smile and funny faces bring to my heart. I sometimes think it will literally explode inside of my chest. Of course people told me this all throughout my pregnancy, but I couldn’t fathom this love existed until I actually experienced it myself. Motherhood is hard, but it rules!
So what say you, fellow parents? What surprised you about having a newborn baby?
Elizabeth 08.27.2013
I think something that surprised me was how much more I loved my husband. I think it’s something you’ll notice more as time goes on, but seeing him as a DAD, it just made me love him, even more, and in a different way. Of course, I remember feeling all the things you listed, too. :)
Kristi 08.27.2013
I love this post idea. It has been 11 years since I had my daughter, but I have to say I was not prepared at all for what having a child meant to my life, but you’re right. It is all worth it.
Carrie 08.27.2013
Great post – about 3 weeks after my daughter was born, I wanted to make the Croque Monsieur after watching the movie It’s Complicated. Went to Whole Foods to buy the special cheese, bread…baby slept the entire preparation, just as the cheese started to brown she woke up. I remember crying because I had to feed her and all I wanted was my hot food!! Dang hormones!
monica 08.27.2013
ok…i’m gonna be Public Enemy #1 right now buuuuuuuuuuut…I didnt go thru almost any of that! The first 3 weeks, he’d get a 9pm and 2am bottle, which would last til i got up in the morning (@6am). LOVE NYC..same day drop off laundry service. My son was a complete angel, no muss no fuss baby! Thats probably why i never had more kids lol. Maybe cuz i only bottle fed, is the reason i had none of the personal issues u’ve faced. AND you’re spot on with #1. God Bless :D
Val - Corn, Beans, Pigs & Kids 08.27.2013
Warning – the more kids you have the more emotional you are post baby I feel, because now, besides worrying about your newest baby, you are also worrying about their sibling(s) and how they are feeling with all the attention on the new baby and everything. I too believe I didn’t have the baby blues or anything diagnosable post-baby with my pregnancies, but hormones are definitely on high. After baby number two we learned not to over do it with guests after you get home from the hospital. We’ve always limited our guests to immediate family only in the hospital but once you get home, you need alone time, just you, your husband and your kids – your new +1 family.
I think the thing no one talks about is the cramps you have after labor, as your uterus contracts its way to normal size again. I didn’t necessarily think it was anything too much with my first, but once again, the more kids you have, the more painful and longer these “afterpains” are and last.
But it is all worth it for #1!
Rachel S. 08.27.2013
I still make lists because I have become more forgetful, and my kids are 4 and 2. Oh and the crying at random stuff yea that stunk.
Adrienne 08.27.2013
I had my son a week after you had Lincoln. Love that you started a family channel. It is always great to know others are going through some of the same things. I am surprised at how little sleep I can function on, especially the first week. Also, the hormones. It is also great to have friends that have children too. Even better when they are not the sugar coating friend’s and will tell you exactly how hard it is being a mom, but so rewarding. I also didn’t believe people until now. Lastly, I was a planner and I am surprised that since given birth if we have to change plans or appointments or be a little late because my son needs to be fed or changed or spits up then it is ok.
Christie 08.27.2013
What a great list! I just had my little guy on July 19th and I, too, have realized that there’s so many things that I never knew to expect! I definitely experienced that night sweats and I’m STILL more emotional than usual (definitely not as bad as I was the first few weeks, though)! For instance, I started bawling in the car yesterday when Darius Ruckers’ song, “It won’t be like this for long” came on, because I already feel like my baby is growing up too fast!
As for things to add to the list, I’d have to say that I was definitely not prepared for the whole breastfeeding experience (even after taking a breastfeeding class). I had no idea that it would take up so much of my time, and that it would be so painful/overwhelming at first. Thankfully, it DOES get easier as time goes on and I am so glad that I continued to breast feed, even though there were times when I felt like giving up on it! In addition, I had no idea how HUNGRY I would be (due to breastfeeding)! I feel like I’m STARVING quite often…definitely never felt THIS hungry during my pregnancy. (That being said, hank you, breastfeeding, for being a great calorie-burner!)
Secondly, LIMIT YOUR VISITORS! (I probably have a special case here). My husband and I moved from Des Moines to North Carolina last fall, and both of our families still live in Iowa. My mom and sister came to visit for 2 weeks, arriving just a couple days before Max was born. Barely a week after they left, my in-laws came to visit for a week. Don’t get me wrong, we LOVED having them here and appreciate their help with things, but I felt like it made it MORE difficult to establish a routine at home and have time alone as a new little family of three, when we constantly had visitors at our house the first 3 weeks of Max’s life!
Most of all, I feel that there is NOTHING anyone can do or say to prepare you for the amazing feeling of love that you will experience with your baby! I am so in love with my little boy! He makes my heart so completely happy. :) There are times that when I’m sleeping for just a few hours, I’ll wake up and MISS HIM…does that make me crazy?? haha
Melissa 08.27.2013
I am a first time commenter, but I’ve been reading your blog for a few months now. This post has me tearing up. I knew what # 1 was before I even got to it. I love my 4 (almost 5) year old more than I could ever imagine, and # 2 is finally on his/her way after 3 1/2 years of trying! And I can’t wait to do it all over again.
Everyone tells you how much you are going to love your child, but until he/she is here, you never really fully ‘get’ it. It’s breathtaking!!!
Libby 08.27.2013
Love this post! I’m due in a few weeks and am constantly trying to soak up every last ounce of info I can find but in the end I know a lot of it you just have to experience yourself before you really understand all the advice. Still…this is all great info and I’ll have to come back to it after I have my little guy:). Thanks for sharing – Lincoln is adorable!!
JennP 08.27.2013
I see others covered it, but even though I’d heard of post-partum hair loss, I had no idea how much hair I’d actually lose! I think it happened around 4-6 months after my girls were born. I joked that it was nature’s way of cutting down my blow-drying time, but then all the wispy, annoying flyaways grew in and I stopped laughing! You’ll probably have a whole new list of things you didn’t expect in a few months. It’s such an adventure!
Stefanie @ Sarcastic Cooking 08.27.2013
Oh gosh! I feel like I am having night sweats right now and I still have three months to go until our little guy gets here! Thanks for these helpful tips. I feel like I am prepared for December but deep down I know no matter how much I read and plan this little guy will have his own agenda.
Jess R 08.27.2013
Love this! Thanks for this post, and please keep them coming! My first is due in December, and I’d love all of the “what I wish I’d known” posts I can get!
Jess 08.27.2013
One more thing that no one told me about is the emotional roller coaster hits again when you stop nursing. I thougt I was prepared to be done with it as my supply had been slowly dwindling, but the hormornes hit me like a ton of bricks!! Thankfully, it lasted about a week and after I googled and found out it was totally normal, I felt much better.
Amanda @ Once Upon a Recipe 08.27.2013
Those Aden and Anais swaddle blankets are my favorite – I always give them as a gift to my new mom friends and they LOVE them.
Jamie 08.27.2013
You nailed this list, Kristin, and #1 is the utter truth. I’m still in #7 after a year, ditto the hair loss comments (stops after you stop nursing, at least for me), and I was having horrible scary dreams the first few weeks due to lack of sleep so that wasn’t fun. My big Didn’t-realize item was how warm and fuzzy I would feel watching my husband be a first-time daddy. And he was also my rock when the crazy would set in.
Melissa 08.27.2013
Oh yes!! This is a great one! I fell in love with my husband all over again watching him with our daughter!
natalie@thesweetslife 08.27.2013
LOVE these family posts! Keep ’em coming! :)
Tiff @ Love Sweat & Beers 08.27.2013
I still have about 10 weeks left before my little one arrives, but I’m glad I saw this! :)
Katie C. 08.27.2013
My son just turned 2 and the thing that no one ever told me about being a parent is that you will no longer be able to finish a conversation, ever. I love my little guy to death, but sometimes I just want to catch up with someone and find out how they’re doing. Its a bit difficult when one or both of you has a toddler running around who needs your attention every other minute. :-) but enjoy it all! as your #1 says, it is ALL WORTH IT!!
Geni 08.27.2013
Isn’t it amazing how one tiny person controls EVERYTHING?
Your entire life revolves around what Lincoln needs. You and Ben seem to be adjusting quite well.